Tear It Down


give yourself a breakTear it all down.  Go ahead.  It is okay.  Just be a merciful.

After a disastrous first half of 2019 and the need to establish a more positive path forward, I needed to tear myself down.  I needed to reduce myself to my most basic self.  Let go of adult responsibility (to a point) and let my inner kid out.

  • Dairy Queen, oh yes!
  • In’N’Out double double with animal fry, heck yay!
  • Sleeping in till noon, why not?
  • Binge on Hoarders, sure!
  • Wear my pajamas all day and not even shower, YASS!
  • Look for a job, hahahahaha! no way jose!

Let the boundaries, let the rules, let the adult critic inside take a week or two off. Let’s be a kid again. Eventually, the adult in me will come back, fresh and new, and help me rebuild and move on as we near the 2019 holidays.

What will this adult rebuild?  Not sure yet.  Between junk food binges and Hulu outages I have been exploring thoughts.  Some of these thoughts are more realistic than others.  One thing is certain, a career change is imminent.  The new career will not be dependent upon the technology that is tearing up our society.  I have spent so much of my life behind a computer, I feel my time is served.  I just need to listen to myself a bit more and let Mr Adult in me formulate a plan and find more balance between what is real, myself, and that technology no one can escape.

 

A New Beginning


Life.  It happens.

We get pushed, pulled, twisted, and stretched as we conquer our fears, chase our dreams, accept our limitations, and diligently execute on our responsibilities.

Sometimes we make a change seeking something different and better, only to fall down and wish we had never made a change.  It takes us longer to get back up and moving again with another change to change course on the original change.

After moving to Seattle from Santa Barbara, I fell.  My heart was still in paradise and my inspirations were swept away with the grey, dreary rain and cold of a Seattle winter.  Not only did I learn about my allergy to high humidity and barometric pressure changes, but I learned how much being true to yourself and your values is far more important than making any new life work.  There is much more to this story which will be revealed as I move into this new beginning.

This fall, I am relocating to Colorado.  The area of Boulder and Louisville at the foothills of the Rocky Mountains.  I was born in Englewood, so I feel like I am coming home.  Unlike Seattle, Colorado has a lot more sun during the winter even though it is significantly colder with periodic snow.

You can tell a lot about whether you are in the right place by how you feel. We humans have an instinct which helps protect us.  From the start, I never felt great about living in the Puget Sound area.  By contrast, I am happy in Colorado with a collected, calm head.

This is a new beginning.  A restart of my love for fitness, cycling, and triathlon.  I have 25 “Seattle” pounds to shed and a training program to rebuild.  But I’ve done this before and have fond memories of my triathlon journey.  I am looking forward to not only meeting a bunch of new people, but also feeling great again.

You know, life happens.  But now it will happen a bit differently.

Some Inspiration: Apolo and a Warrior


Reading is one thing I really enjoy doing right before bed time.  Spending a few minutes with a great book gives me an opportunity to wind down and focus on something more inspirational.

Apolo’s Dedication From the Heart

While I am reading a few books at the moment, one of them is Apolo Ohno’s “Zero Regrets.”  Apolo is a very inspirational person and I find his story quite motivating for both life in general and the sport of triathlon.  Here is a segment of his book that really caught my attention:

He was teaching me right then and there the most fundamental thing: You have to dedicate your heart and soul to something.  Then you go forward; you don’t look back.  And you don’t hold back.  You go after whatever that thing is without being afraid to fail.

After reading this segment, I really wanted to yell out “Yeah, go Apolo!”  But then it was late at night and I didn’t want to wake anyone up.   To me, dedicating your heart and soul to something is, perhaps, one of the hardest things to do.   It means maintaining focus, avoiding distractions, and implementing a dream that comes straight from the heart!

My dream from the heart was to finish a sprint triathlon.  In fact, I finished seven! During this journey I faced a lot of hurdles, snuck by distractions and learned so much about life, fitness, and the sport of triathlon that reflecting back on it, makes me want to cry with joy.

The Commitment of the Dancing Warrior

I have also been reading the “Spirit of the Dancing Warrior,” which uses zen exercises to help the athlete perform to a new level.  With a new focus each week, the book helps the athlete focus on connecting with the inner soul.  Starting with Emptyness (being ready to learn) and Gratefulness (take things for granted), I have now moved on to the Commitment focus.   The segment below grabbed my attention:

Consider whether your lack of commitment is simple complacency or whether you might want to look deeper to see if there is another sport or activity that will engender a higher level of commitment.  In other words, lack of commitment may be a sign that it’s time to move on to something else that’s more appropriate to your development at this particular time.

After reading this segment shortly after reading the segment from Apolo’s book above, it sent a chill down my spine.  What if my struggles during the winter are really an indication that I need to do something completely different for the winter months?

I am not sure what that would be and I would have to do some more research, but it is something to think about.  Instead of triathlon training (swim, bike, run, strength, yoga), maybe I should take up karate or kayaking.

Whatever I choose, it has to come from the heart and once selected, I must be committed to it.  Are you committed from your heart?

The Inner Tiger Needs to Get Out


If there is any more satisfying indication of my life change over the past three years, it is this:

“Suffering from a sprained ankle which is keeping my training to a minimum, the voice in the back of my mind is screaming to get out for a run and the legs are ready to run like a tiger chasing its prey.”

Three years ago, I would have been perfectly content to sit all day.  Today, if I sit too long, I go nuts.  I am so happy to report that I have achieved an active lifestyle and I have stuck with it.

This tiger is quite content, but is thinking about capturing larger, faster prey when his ankle heels!

The Rising Sun


It is amazing when certain things pop into your brain.  The scene painted below is inspiration for our new day, every 24-hours.

“The sun rises on a new day.  The light sparkles oranges, yellows, pinks, and whites across the rippling, serene surface of the water.  It fills our hearts with the joy, inspiration, love, and energy to make this new day the best ever.” – Aric Monts

Rising Sun

Seize the new day before it becomes history.  Make change, make joy, make love, and live this day like nothing else matters.